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Stalking and Cyberstalking

Stalking is any willful and repeated action that would cause a reasonable person to feel harassed, frightened or intimidated. While many people believe that stalkers are harmless and best left alone, stalking is a very serious crime that can often escalate to physical violence and/or sexual assault.

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Stalking

Stalking can take many forms. Learn about them and how to protect yourself.

  • Calling, texting, direct messaging, emailing or sending letters
  • Waiting outside or inside a residence
  • Watching from afar
  • Following
  • Showing up uninvited
  • Sending gifts

Often, one single incidence of these actions alone would not raise alarm with most people. But when these actions are repeated and the target is made to feel afraid or intimidated, they take on a much more sinister appearance. In addition, they constitute a violation of a person’s privacy and sense of well-being, and they break the law.

Cyberstalking

Cyberstalkingis repeated contact through electronic media that causes a reasonable person to feel intimidated, afraid or controlled. The objective is to maintain or acquire personal contact with the target.

This is the most common type of stalker. Three out of four people who are stalked are stalked by someone they know, such as a former intimate partner, date or casual acquaintance.Former romantic partners sometimes believe that their targets have wronged them, and they want to retaliate. Other times, they are intent on wreaking havoc on their target's life, believing, "If I can't have the target, nobody will."Casual acquaintances can be stalkers too. They are often attempting to get the target to notice them and actually be with them. They are typically driven by the fantasy that with enough attention, the target will be flattered and agree to face-to-face meetings.

About 10-25 percent of people who are stalked are stalked by a stranger. Strangers who engage in cyber stalking meet or target their victims through social media and online forums and communities.

Strangers often begin with a grooming process designed to gain the trust of their target. Their goal is to gather information about the target while working towards initiating face-to-face contact. Most strangers are in the same general age range and geographical area as their target.

Frequently, with both strangers and familiars, stalkers will post defamatory or derogatory statements about their target online. This is designed to get a reaction or response from their target, thereby initiating contact. 

  • Do not respond to the stalker. Face-to-face contact to "work it out" is never advisable and can be very dangerous. 
  • Save all communications and postings from the stalker. Record dates and times of any contact, descriptions of the incident and note any witnesses (e.g., other people who saw the posting online). 
  • If the contacts continue, consider getting a protection order from local law enforcement and file a report to see what, if any, charges can be filed. Save copies of police reports and record all contact with law enforcement officials and the prosecutor's office. 
  • Consider blocking the stalker from contacting you. Also consider that the stalker may escalate stalking behavior in the face of obstacles to contact. 
  • Securely guard your information, especially any forms of contact you change to avoid a stalker. Avoid sharing your email address or phone number online, and consider using encryption software and privacy protection programs.